Sunday, January 23, 2011


Luck was with me tonight. The streets were deserted and there wasn't a cop in sight. I was driving at eighty miles per hour and ran four stoplights...yeah I wasn't too conscious about the laws tonight. My thoughts were buzzing around two heart-breaking questions. What if I was too late? And what if she was dead? Those screams had not been getting spanked screams. I blinked causing wet moisture to fall from my eyes. She had to be alive. Without her, I wouldn't be able to go on.2

I rounded the last corner to Jasmine's house, my tires squealing loudly against the pavement in protest. I zoomed down the street, slamming down on my brakes as I reached her house. I threw the car door open, not bothering to close it behind me. Jasmine's skateboard was laying on the lawn. She was definitely here then. Lights were glowing against the windows...but there was still a very creepy feeling making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.3

The front door was unlocked. I went inside slowly and quietly. No one was in sight. My heart was shooting out of my chest. In what state was I going to find her? 4

She wasn't in the living room.5

I went into the kitchen. And there she was.6

“Oh God!” I cried, running to her. She was sprawled out on the floor with her back to me, and a huge, broken lamp beside her. There was blood leaking out of her mouth and a cut on her cheek. A huge bruise was visible on her forehead and her shirt was pulled up a bit, revealing a couple more bruises on her back. Her eyes were closed as if she were in a deep sleep.7

I fell onto my knees next to her. “Jasmine! Please wake up!” I sobbed. I gently turned her around so she was lying on her back. “You have to be alive! You have to be...” My tears were cascading from my eyes and landing on her cheek. I wanted to check her heartbeat...but I was scared that I wouldn't hear it. I laid my ear against her chest. No pulse sounded. I felt sick to my stomach. But then...her heart gave a single beat. I kept listening. Another beat. I sighed. She was alive, but her heartbeat was feeble.8

What was I going to do now? The hospital! Duh! This whole situation wasn't letting me think straight. 9

All of a sudden, I heard a door creak open upstairs. “Bitch, you better have gotten up! Get me another fucking beer!”10

Shit! It was her! ...She had done this...her own mother! The sickness in my stomach returned.11

“Don't worry Angel, I wont let her hurt you anymore. I'm here.” I scooped Jasmine's unconscious body into my arms and sprinted out of that goddamned house.12




Its been two weeks and Jasmine still hasn't woken up. She's in a coma...and the doctors have no idea when she will wake up. Every day after school, I came directly to the hospital to see her. And every day, I had hope that she'd be awake when I got there. It hadn't happened yet but I didn't lose the hope. I spent hours in her room talking to her or sometimes I just held her hand. The doctors and nurses said she couldn't hear me but I didn't believe it. 16

I only left late at night when the nurse kicked me out. On the weekends, Mr. Turner, Jasmine's dad, let me sleep in here overnight. He like loves me now because, according to the doctors, I saved his daughter's life. 17

Seeing Jasmine just lying there, not moving...made me feel like a part of me had died and would only be revived when she came out of her coma. I hadn't laughed or smiled for two weeks. Sleep was almost impossible and despite my tremendous appetite, I barely ate. My parents were worried that I'd gone into a depression. Maybe I had. I told them I'd smile when Jasmine was able to smile again...I missed her smile and the gleam in those beautiful eyes of hers.18

I'd gone to the hospital's cafeteria to get Mr. Turner a yogurt and a bottle of water. I made my way back to the Intensive Care Ward, the route all too familiar. I entered room #2B. There were flowers and cards everywhere from friends and a big-ass teddy bear from Derrick and Jeremy. 19

“Thanks Alexander.” Mr Turner said gratefully as I handed him the yogurt and water.20

“No problem, sir.” I sat back down on the sofa next to him. My eyes were directed at Jasmine. I sighed, she was still in the same position.21

“So um, that's a lip ring right?”22


“Yes sir.”24

“Does it hurt.”25

I blinked. “I barely know its there.”26

Mr. Turner nodded. “Jasmine wants one...well actually two. Think she called them snake holes.”27

I almost smiled. But it didn't completely form.28

“She must have said snakebites.” I corrected.29

“Yes, that's it. Umm, Alexander...what exactly are your feelings towards Jasmine?”30

Wow, awkward.31

“Well Mr. Turner, to be honest, I love her.” I answered.32

To my surprise, he chuckled. “I figured. No boy would do the things you do for my daughter if it weren't out of love.”33

At that moment, a nurse came in...and not just any nurse. The evil one. I glared.34

“Mr. Turner, Mrs. Turner would like to know if she can come and see her daughter for a few minutes.”35

“I don't see why not. I'll bring her myself.” Mr. Turner stood and straightened his white polo shirt. “I'll be back in a few Alexander.”36

I nodded. They left37

Jasmine's mother was here at the hospital too, in the mental ward. She was staying here in order to be closer to Jasmine, but she was going to be checked into a psychiatric clinic in two weeks whether Jasmine woke up or not. She was given two options: jail or get help. At first I thought she'd chosen the get help option so she wouldn't get locked up. Then, I realized that her actions had brought a major change in Mrs. Turner. She was stricken with grief at what she'd done to Jasmine and it'd finally hit her that she was sick. I knew she was truly trying now but every time she was in the room with Jasmine, I felt uneasy.38

I got up and sat in the chair by Jasmine's bed. I took her hand into mine and squeezed it. She was so pale, no color in her cheeks. What saddened me the most were her closed eyes. I terribly missed the blue in them. I found it easier to pretend she was asleep.39

“Your mom is coming to see you. But don't let that stop you from waking up. She isn't coming to harm you. Turns out she really does love you. Shame she had to figure that out by putting you in a coma.”40

It got hard for me to swallow. My eyes watered.41

“Jasmine, I need you. Life isn't the same without your laughter and your kisses. You don't understand how much I miss hurts. And everyone else misses you too. Wake up soon, love. I'm begging you. I know you're trying, I know you can hear me no matter what the doctors say. Fight sweetheart. I love you.”42

I planted a kiss on her hand.43

Jasmine's P.O.V44

I was lying straight on my back. The darkness kept pushing me down. It felt like water was slowly drowning me. Light spilled from above but I couldn't reach it no matter how hard I tried. It feels like I've been captured here for years.45

Sometimes I heard voices, one of them was clearer and came more often than the others, a male. I didn't recognize them however. But something told me I knew them. The male voice had to be someone special to me. He told me that he loved and other beautiful things every time he talked to me. I couldn't always hear him, however, even if I knew he was there.. Nothing I've heard him say gave me a clue of who I was and why I was here, only that my name was Jasmine.46

I laid there in the darkness, growing more restless by the minute. I struggled and struggled against the invisible ropes binding me down, but I still couldn't get up.47

I didn't understand what this was. Stuck in darkness with light above me, never hungry nor tired. I wasn't even able to speak. All I was sure of was that the light was my way out of here. I'd gotten close to reaching it many times before, but I was always pulled back. The male voice helped me though. He soothed me, gave me the strength I needed. I wish he'd come to me now. I missed him.48

As if on cue, I heard his voice. It was faint but growing louder.49

“Wake up soon, love. I'm begging you. I know you're trying, I know you can hear me no matter what the doctors say. Fight sweetheart. I love you.” he said, gently.50

I clawed the open space in front of me desperately, trying to reach him. I am fighting! I want to get out of here!51

He started singing then. What a beautiful voice he had.52

“When I see your smile53

Tears run down my face 54

I can't replace55

And now that I'm stronger I've figured out”56

The light inched closer. I pushed myself harder, stretching my hands out as far as they would go towards the white haven. The darkness mercilessly tried to stop me.57

“How this world turns cold58

And breaks through my soul59

And I know I'll find deep inside me60

I can be the one”61

A name popped into my head. Alexander! Yes, that was his name! Alexander! The light jumped closer. I was a foot away...62

“I will never let you fall63

I'll stand up with you forever64

I'll be there for you through it all65

Even if saving you sends me to Heaven”66

My eyes opened, and I flinched at the hospital lights above me.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Life is Precious

Penat aku seharian..
kuliah berturut-turut..
argh!!kerja berlambak kat otak.
pening giler jugak aku..
betapa susahnya aku rasakan..
fuh...sangat menyakitkan hati tika lec tu sowg yg WIRED
tadi kat kelas.
sesangat bila tertwa pasal CAMFROG..
ahaha teruk sangat adoi..malunyer bukan maen..
tuhan sajalah taw uhuh
so...skang ni ngah bz wat assignmnt..
prut da bunyi kriuk2 kriuk..
kesianla kat aku ni...

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Kisah Benar tenTang seSeorang

seperti biasa,
kami akan ke kuliah bersama-sama namun kisah ini terjadi tika KKi yang berlangsung kat ***
seseorang yang aku maksudkan itu adalah sahabat baru yang terdekat..

kisah diceritakan:
aku rasa berdosa untuk sujud kepada-Nya,
aku rasa bersalah kepada kedua orang tua ku
kerna kemahkotaan diriku tercalar akibat daripada seorang jejaka yang amat aku benci..
Bukan kerna sayang ku korbankan semuanya namun diriku terpukau dengan renungan matanya..
jelas sekali aku tak bisa melawan setiap kata-katanya..
bukan kerna cinta namunkerna ilmu yang dipakai olehnya..

diriku ternoda!!
sakit sekali ku rasakan betapa kejamnya dikau meragut tanpa kerelaanku..
menangis aku seharian..
engkau BINATANG!!
diriku yang suci kini tak bermakna..
apa makna sebuah DARA kepada masyarakat jikalau itu semua telah tiada...
dan selepas itu..
aku seharian menghabiskan waktu memakan buah nenas
bukan kerna mengidam
kebencianku menghadapi anak haram..
nasib menyebelahiku tika ternyata aku tidak hamil..

sungguh kejam engkau!!
siang malam ku berdoa kepada ilahi
agar kau terima padahnya..
seingatanku lagi...
kau pernah berkata selepas mengoyakkanku..
"lepas ni berisilah badan kau"
sungguh hina aku rasakan..

dan selepas itu,
kau pergi dariku..menghilangkan diri
tanpa balasan sms mahupun calling
telah penat aku mencari tuk kau bertanggungjawab atas perbuatan paksamu terhadapku..
namun yang kau balas hanyalah duka..
tapi yang menghairankan..
kau kembali menghubungiku kerna menginginkannya lagi!!

sejak itu,
aku sentiasa berhati-hati dan tak akan memaafkan kesalahan kejammu itu sampai mati..


Itu semua kisah sahabatku..
sungguh menyayat hati..
moga dia masih suci dimata tuhan walaupun sudah tidak berdara lagi/...

Saturday, January 1, 2011

akU dah jadi mahasiswi UiTm!!

orentasi Mds mmg pnat..
tuhan saja la tau bgaimana prsaan saya..
penat ssgatttt tapi kan yg best tu dpat knlan seU ngan dowg..
tu part yg best hahah
actually byk nk tulis tp skg ngah pening k ar nty smbung hehehe